Huzzy

Huzzy has taught me so many things. He knows his own worth and would never let someone influence it, and so I've learned the way to be a person. We fell in love at first sight, you will see how beautiful our love is.

The Bear has shown the Huzzy's picture and at the first sight I thought: wow this is my man. So many days later, when we took mushrooms together for so not the first time, I've discovered we've met before in our previous lives. We have a quest to find each other in every life we were born into. I know it's bullshit from the science perspective, but you see things under the influence of mind-bending substances.

So that time the Bear shows me a picture of him and I realize that I'm fucked. I'm fucked big time and there is no way out of it. That summer we were not meant to meet, and he came back to St. Petersburg without me having any opportunity to have influence on that. Then the Bear said he would come back for the autumn holidays, but he didn't, and I thought the chance slipped away. I texted him on Facebook and Instagram, only to know years later that he wasn't using it exactly at that period. Now I know he has such periods, when he wants the world and himself to think that he's better than he is. This ghost is chasing him still. And that's okay.

The winter came, and it was that magical time on the year's border when everyone is constantly drunk. In Berlin, everyone has an excuse to be drunk all the time, but this time of year they have even more excuses. So we met at BBB on Ostbahnhof in the most blatant circumstances imaginable: we sat and ate burgers, and then he enters with the Bear and the North Fox into the most unspectacular scenery imaginable. The moment I saw him, I realized this is him. This is the moment when all your entity is filled with it, the feeling that you are meant to be with this person for the rest of your life. The feeling, you are following the very path the destiny has prepared for you. Years later, I would find out we've met before so many times, so many parties and celebrations, restaurants and underground chthonic animals have led us to this very moment. At that moment, I've learned what real love is.

He entered the restaurant, so gorgeous, so independent, so fabulous. I had to pretend that I'm not interested, I had to look away all the time, but I realized that he was even more handsome than in the pictures, the most attractive man I've ever met in my life.

Out of a sudden, he stands up, and I was worried. I was worried that he goes to sniff some ancient potent powders, to which I was so opposed back then, to which I'm not opposed to anymore. Back then, it was a big deal.

I followed him to the bathroom as if that were an accident that we went there at the same time, and I witnessed the most disturbing: he's brushing his teeth. He wore braces back then, and he cleaned them after the meal. Bitch, that set the tone for our entire relationship like nothing else. Me assuming the worst, him just brushing his teeth.

We then talked, and he was charmingly silent and mysterious. We then took a taxi to Flax and I sang karaoke for him. We then went to my place and made the most amazing love, so juicy, so fulfilling, so adventurous.

I fell in love forever. It was 6 years ago. If love is not this, then what. I'll always be grateful for you, my sweet Huzzy.

Forever yours, Ady.