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Hi, weirdos! Are you still there? If this entire thing is only for Ramtin to get better, I'm invested.

While having a conversation with a psychologist at ADHDCentraal I figured that many of the things I do in life, that other people don't, are, in fact, just coping mechanisms. You see, normies' minds don't jump from one topic to another, and they can hold their intent for more than 15 seconds. When they want to do something, they just stand up and do it, instead of going through torturous cycles of self-loathing one-more-instagram-video kind of self dialogue in vain.

And here I present, from ADHD people for ADHD people:

Here I collect all the ways to tame my hyperactivity and focus peculiarities.

Zero Inbox

Zero inbox was buzzy around 10 years ago, when people struggled with their emails being full of spam and unwanted requests. The main idea is that you postpone the emails the same way you do with your tasks in a to-do list, or archive them right away if the associated task is done. Google's Inbox, now dead like many of their best products after they have become the very evil they've sworn to eradicate, has beautifully represented this concept and I loved it.

To achieve the same look and fill, I recommend simplify gmail, a wonderful Chrome extension to make your Gmail a modern touch (OMG it needs one) and a great tool on the way to implementing zero inbox.

If you get overwhelmed by emails, you have to group them first. Set up folders and grouping filters. Decide which emails are important. Shipping emails are not. Your goal is 10 emails per day to sort out, tops. All the rest is noise. If you get many emails from a certain website or app, turn off those notifications in the app itself. Nothing is more important than a clean slate at the end of the day.

Why is this crucial for ADHD-people? You see, the major source of anxiety and depression for us is all the side quests we start, that cause the fear that we forgot something already and that we won't be able to finish whatever impulse is in our focus area right now. Besides that, we struggle with being distracted just for the same reason. The solution is simple: keep your daily activities limited and organized, reach the clean state at the end of the day, even if some of the tasks need to be postponed. Estimate your capacity for the day, so you don't overstretch it with side hustles and also invest it in a planned manner, and you achieve a deliverable eventually.

Simplenote

When your creative muscle just can't stop producing things, you may want to channel the results somewhere. Those are unstructured thoughts, swirling around in your head like a hurricane, and they just need to be put out somewhere. Some people use paper notebooks for that, and I don't judge but stop killing trees people. I mean it, stop, Germany, fucking stop killing trees to keep information on their dead bodies. Just stop ok?

I really love Simplenote because they have a decent client for Linux and other OSes, where so you can always return to it and structure it to the next level, which in my case is Todoist.

Todoist

Todoist it THE game changer for ADHD-people. I store all my thoughts in there. It has all sorts of filtering and grouping mechanisms, that will help you with organizing the chaos of your mind, but the absolute killer feature is the inbox.

Inbox is an analogue of that data lake: you can put whatever thought is on your mind, and the app makes it so easy. You can add it with a widget or even from the taskbar on Android, I'm sure nothing like this exists for Apple because it's Apple. They will sell it as a brand-new feature in 2035, don't worry. $1499,99, please.

At the moment the task is created, there is no mandatory information but the task itself, and when you are ready, I call it sorting Fridays, you analyze the stream of your crazy ideas and decide whether they are worth at hit. Or not, that's fine.

One more killer feature for me is integration with Google Calendar: your tasks can be assigned to a date, and they will show up there. The synchronization works both ways, so if you move it around in the calendar, the task will be reassigned to a new day in your Todoist accordingly. Genius!

When I started using it, I amped my game people, I just became a different person. Another side is that I get low-key paranoid when the task is not done, but well, it's a little price to pay to get rid of the looming anxiety that follows in steps of every ADHD-fella. You can always postpone it if you like, that's also fine.

Fewer notifications

One more thing that reduced my everyday stress is limiting push notifications. Even people with no attention deficit or hyperactivity struggle not to fall under the bombardment of constant attention sucking messages.

First, remove unused apps from your phone. Do it regularly, most phones have functionality to identify them and remove them quickly. If you haven't opened the app for half a year, you probably won't ever.

Second, disable notifications in your messengers and email. None of that can be that important, that you won't be able to reply once a day. Leave the notifications on for most important contacts, that are not spamming you with raccoon videos. Turn them off on Instagram and TikTok immediately, they don't deserve your attention, no regrets. Once you see a rogue notification in your tray, go to the app settings and turn off the notifications completely. Important apps will double messages on email, no software developer will deliver an important message with push notifications only because they are not guaranteed to be delivered. Source: I'm a developer.

Once a day, you get back to your devices and check all the messages you got, without getting those micro interactions, that push you to the side quests. Once a day, when you are ready, and not when they want you to act.

Every time you install a new app, disable its push notifications.

And one last thing I recommend: get a work phone with work apps on it, or don't install work apps on your phone. The work should remain at work and should not influence your private life. This works for every person, but is crucial for ADHD-folks like us.

Rest enough, creativity requires headspace.

Once a dopamine hunter-gatherer hyper focuses on something, the rest of the world stops spinning. It's only you and that crocheting/guitar/Star Wars game and nothing and no one else. In such moments and sometimes days, we forget about everything around us and most importantly forget about ourselves. With eyes on the prize in chase for that motivation we will often neglect the most import of our needs - rest.

Have you ever found yourself at the end of such dopamine-rush, when you hate your life and have no will to even get out of the bed in the morning? All the batteries are empty, although yesterday it seemed as if you could rule the world with your color books? You are not alone. The solution to it: plan regular retreats. I know we hate routine, I know we hate plans. Use your husband, if you have one with overfunctional manager disorder, like mine.

In general, OCD and ADHD are very compatible. They say the best match is boring and crazy, I say:

ADHD + ADHD = MESS
OCD + OCD = Concentration camp
ADHD + OCD = LOVE, with a little disdain on a side

Did I just quote myself?

ADHD needs order but can't plan it, which OCD can and will do. ADHD needs somebody to clean up the pile of mess they leave behind, and OCD is excellent with it, although they despise the ADHD for it.

OCD needs someone to help them relax and stop fixating on that undone laundry. OCD needs ADHD random side quests and a fountain of emotions and creativity that they are. ADHD slightly despises them for being so predictable.

Of course, I'm not completely serious, but you get the point. Me and my OCD husy.

Where was I? Yes, plan the rest. Here is my routine.

Small rest: Sauna.

There is a nice spa center in Amsterdam Bos, Zuiver, that is SO GOOD. They enforce no smartphones rule, and they also have naked and non-naked days. Do naked day! Sauna is about recovering your body and it has to be free. We all born naked, FKK forever. Love your body, cherish it, take all the crèmes you have and the brush and just love your body. Give it the rest and relaxation it deserves.

Vabali SPA in Berlin is absolutely bamboozled. It's full of good-looking naked clueless heterosexuals, and it's only naked. All sorts of saunas there, even a Russian sauna, which I miss a lot. Of course, they do it like German soljanka (I only pronounce it with German accent because has nothing to do with the Russian dish солянка, Germans somehow manage to fuck up any food they touch), but the smell of birchwood from the walls and branches wow. Now I started craving it out of a sudden, to Berlin!

Big rest: Portugal

Nothing to add here, Portugal is amazing.

Drugs: Mushrooms

No stimulators make you rest, surprise-surprise. Only mushrooms have a lasting effect and I plan to take them soon again. In the Netherlands, truffles are legal and if you do it right, the benefits absolutely tremendous. Every time I took them, I had real insights about my life: about me hating Germany, although I spent there 11 years of my life, about my family and relationships. I'll make a separate post about mushrooms, but if you have an opportunity to do it, and you have never tried before: you should try it if you are psychologically okay and don't have a history of hardcore conditions known for you or your family members (schizophrenia, delusion, psychosis).

Friends

The last thing and most important thing is that you need like-minded people around. And you will probably cluster with other neurodivergent if not ADHD people, without even knowing it. We crave novelty, we give novelty to each other. It's never a dull moment with my best judies, we can talk for hours and keep dopamine production on post-industrial level.

That's it, beatch that turned out longer than expected 😄

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